margotbean.com
sheeshus, a blog is a lot of work

12/01/2009 - Education Gone Awry?

A local commercial for a SuperBowl contest claims that two "runner up's" will win a $50 gift card. Can you spot what's wrong with that statement?

The contest is a joint effort between a local University and the local CBS affiliate. "Go team!"

12/03/2009 - Garbage Day

It's winter here on the Great Lakes. Don't you hate it when you realize that you have to not only put on shoes, but a heavy coat, hat, and gloves just to walk to the curb?

My informal survey of coworkers shows that 12% of men refuse to get bundled up; they brave the cold uncovered. 98% of women say they make their husbands take out the trash. Times like these I wish I could find a good "rent-a-husband" service. Brrr!

12/19/2009 - Winter continues

Color me annoyed. I was awoken this Saturday morning by three kids knocking on my door and ringing the bell for five minutes. It seems they wanted to shovel my driveway. I find this perplexing, as three sets of bootprints seems to have completely removed the thin trace of powder that's currently fallen.

I want to praise their ambition and work ethic, I really do, but with the lack of snow and the early hour, I feel more like the victim of aggressive telemarketing than someone who's crushed the hopes of three teens facing a weekend with no disposable income.

It's not that I'm opposed to paying someone else to do a difficult job -- two years ago I paid a boy $20 to shovel 8" from my driveway and sidewalk. I watched him as he worked, seemingly in fast-forward. He really attacked it, finishing in about ten minutes what would have taken me an hour. So, I felt the hour's pay I gave him was well worth it. Unfortunately, he never came back! I can only hope he did well enough to buy a fleet of snowplows, and move to Buffalo, NY, where he's sure to become a millionaire.

As for me, I'm left without the best, and without proper rest.

2/3/2010 - A Crime Against Vegetarianism

My favorite veggie dogs, made by Morningstar Farms®, have been discontinued, due to supplier issues: http://www.morningstarfarms.com/veggiedog.aspx. Does the mafia control the soy supply now? Or is it trade sanctions against North Korea? Nobody's fessing up! I'm completely devastated!

2/18/2010 - Update

Kellogg's responded to my email protesting the discontinuation of Veggie Dogs...they suggested I substitute Veggie Sausage Links instead. I emailed them and said if they expected me to serve breakfast sausage at a large summer picnic, they'd lost their minds. If this is an indication of their business sense, I'm not surprised they can't find a kitchen to make their veggie dogs anymore...

2/6/2010 - The joys of home ownership

I don't know which is worse...it took me 2 weeks to rake all those leaves.

2/18/2010 - It's Still Winter on the Great Lakes

As I spend hours shoveling and shoveling and still shoveling snow, I wonder where those kids are - the ones who used to wake me up early on the weekend wanting to shovel the inch of snow in my driveway.

I amuse myself while shoveling by thinking of ways I would pummel them.

3/4/2010 - Beeeeeagle!

My neighbors got a new dog for Christmas. A beagle puppy named Bailey. She's unbelievably cute, curious, and well-behaved (...for a puppy, of course). As I watch her, I think "there may be no greater joy than a puppy's first romp in the snow."

While watching Bailey euphorically inspect every snowdrift, an acute melancholy comes over me. I think of images I've seen of beagles in cages. Not in adoption shelters, but in testing labs.

Beagles are used for cosmetic tests, as well as tests on chemicals used for cleaning toilets, dishes, floors, and for all I know, garbage trucks. They're used because they're docile and submissive. They're abused because they're nice dogs.

Most people explain their thoughts on animal testing by saying "If a rat has to die so a human doesn't, then so be it." I wish they knew the horrors that beagles suffer...adorable, intelligent, joyful beagles.

4/17/2010 - The Times are A'Changin

After years of struggling with an economy-model graphics card (GeForce4 MX), 128MB memory, and a 40 GB hard drive, I finally decided to buy a new computer. I bought it online, and it arrived just two days ago.

Right out of the box, I wondered "Why is this monitor so shiny?" It was like a mirror, I tell you! All of my unwashed, pajama-clad, 8:45-in-the-morning glory, being reflected back at me in brilliant black clarity...disturbing! I quickly concluded that it must have some protective cover on it, and I would rip it off and burn it later.

Alas, this was not to be the case. The "protective cover" I thought I saw turned out to be only four thin strips of plastic covering the chrome-like border of the screen. I had indeed purchased a new mirror for my pc. *sigh*

But that wasn't the end of my dismay. Late at night, as I tried to play Deus Ex: Invisible War, a game I bought several years ago, and have never been able to play (because the GeForce4 MX doesn't support pixel shaders), the effects of the MIRROR's 16:9 aspect ratio became apparent. Everyone was short and fat. Stretched, it seems, from one end of the mirror to the other. Sacre bleu! What have I done to myself?!

5/22/2010 - VOD News...sort of

Tim Williams finally updated VOD's myspace page. (Sometime in early March.) It appears they have the songs for the new album...now they have to go through the finishing process. "Maybe some tour dates in 'late spring'."

I can't imagine what the holdup is, but that's really not surprising, me being stuck here on the Great Lakes far far from the eye of the hardcore scene...if any even exists anymore, not that I would know.

~ margot is listening to BloodSimple's first album, having thoroughly consumed Still and the green album earlier this evening ~

3/28/2011 - Deus Ex: Human Revolution Buzz

I read an excellent article about Deus Ex: Human Revolution the other day. It was so well-written, it made me realize that I will never be a writer.

Apparently Deux Ex 3 is going to use Steamworks for pc. I can't express my disappointment at the thought of having to be connected to the web each and every second I'm playing the game... Such a shitty thing to do to legitimate game-buyers! ...I don't want to "be part of a gaming community", I want to turn the phone off, make the world disappear, and spend some quality time with my computer! Not some teenager from Tai Pei! I hope I never understand why Eidos would do this.

I'm gonna go and play Deus Ex (the first one) on my Windows 7 pc now...because it runs brilliantly, even though it's ten years old...I don't even have to use compatibility mode.

And I'm going to use the cheat codes!

10/17/2011

Has it really been almost a year since I've bothered to post my random thoughts?

I've been completely addicted to a stupid inane game on facebook for about a year now. It's been 6 months since I've even considered writing a new game walkthrough.

I think it's time to start posting some game walkthroughs not written by me, but pimped out and decorated by me, and well-loved for several years.

Questions/comments: Email margotbean@hotmail.com. Be sure to tell me if I can post your email, and how you'd like your name to appear